Today I’m answering the question “How many sessions of experiential sex and intimacy coaching will you need to reach your goals of sexual and intimate fulfillment?”.
Now the answer to that question is: one session, a few sessions, or many sessions. If you’re coming in for a single session, I call it a missing experience session. I’m imagining that you’ve done a lot of work in the realm of sex and relationship and intimacy through workshops, journaling, therapy or other ways, and you’ve got your puzzle pretty much completed, you’re just missing one piece. That one piece, the missing experience, will bring everything together in a good way for the next leg of your journey.
What are some examples of those missing experiences? Well one of them is to be exquisitely and deeply attended to – just having another human being there, present with you for your needs and your desires solely. Another missing experience could be just a pace, which is really, really slow – where you’re having this sexual experience, and you have the opportunity to feel all your sensations, notice your emotions, express them, notice what you’re thinking, and make meaning of everything – so it’s all integrated together, and the slowness allows for that.
Another missing experience, which is so important is one of finely tuned consent – where you are getting exactly what you desire and you’re not getting anything you don’t desire.
These are some examples of the missing experience – that single piece of that puzzle which can bring everything together.
Many other clients come in for a few session or many sessions. For them it’s really about building whole new skill sets and confidence. For example one of the key things that you’ve got to be able to do to be empowered in your sex and intimate life is be able to be embodied. That means using your body as a source of wisdom to inform the experience. Going hand in hand with that skill is another important skill of being able to know very intimately, very explicitly, what it is that you desire and have the confidence to express that in words, or non-verbally, to another human being so that you can receive it.
Another very important skill set, which you can learn, is how to give and receive a wide range of profoundly pleasurable, sensual touch. There’s so much to learn there for most people. It’s like learning a musical instrument or learning how to dance. The important thing is practice. The more you practice, the better you’re going to get at playing or dancing, and the more enjoyable the whole experience becomes.
In any of this work, there is no wasted effort. If you show up for a single session, a few sessions or many sessions, it’s all practice. It’s all going to take you closer to your goals. I hope that answered the question, “How many sessions of experiential sex and intimacy coaching are you going to need to reach your goals of sexual and intimate fulfillment?”